anger

im so fukking angry ! therse fuking little keys on my keybaorad are too small there just getijn in the way,. dsfjklsdgkl;vasdjo gkjsadou cant fukkin think y do i keep using the wirjk fuk the back spaece jsut keep tyupung atleast some ien mytr ber abler to t rwead it si tther wrend !!!!jaaaagaghaghagah!1 K;TWF MJHOW THE GUK CUD EER LOSEE!¬! =4-4 IM gnna fukijnng kill someone words are holding me balkckkkds apdiaskl ljksdfglahjklghdfjlaertrrrgg!!!! fl kj WTF!!!!!

I was thinking...what makes something random? Now I can trace back my trail of thought to when I decided to solve the question earlier than time...why is Merrett’s blog better than mine?! Firstly because Merrett has something I don't, which is talent. But enough about Chris! This is MY blog! I was thinking about the good things about my blog (and there aren't a lot to be fair), but one I did come up with was that I believed mine to be random or unpredictable. Here is where what I thought makes more sense in my head rather than on my screen. Considering I never really use particular topics to focus my writing (well typing actually) on, all my posts could be said to be bits of randomness. If all the posts are going to be based on nothing in particular, it would be quite easy to predict what the next post would be about, which is nothing in particular. And if you can predict something it doesn't make it random. Does that make sense? So back to Merrett's blog, and by the way folks you can find the blog I'm talking about at www.tmroady.blogspot.com. Merrett seems to talk about particular topics each time he posts, so essentially in each post there is a degree of predictability. But you can never predict what he is going to talk about in his post until he posts it with the title. Now is this random? I suppose you could look at every single topic imaginable and take an educated guess at what might pop up next, it won't help but one might decide to do that. Computers are said to be incapable of true randomness. This is because when they are programmed to be random, they pick from a series of options and therefore cannot be truly random.
Another thought has just come up in my head. Sssh! Let me think! ...why did I say "I believed mine to be random or unpredictable" and say it was a "good" thing? Surely unpredictability makes people feel insecure, and I would be making my target audience feel uncomfortable! You know what? I'm going to tell you how I'm going to write my next post. I'm going to write once I have induced a state of hyperactivity through and mild dose of caffeine. Should be fun!

You're awfully cheery today,.... odd

Relief. Sweet sweet relief. I think relief could be the most pleasurable experience on the planet. I mean how good does it feel to go to the toilet when you're really bursting or to finally rest your aching body on a soft warm bed after you realise you can't force yourself to stay awake any longer? I ws tinkin bout it 4 lyk an hour 2day, y is it that all da tings we enjoy r ting we cnt normali do, its like relief frm day 2 day life. i dnt find that tings i can do evryday r fun. tink of it dis way, a fat guy myt get sick of mars bars, bt da very second he goes on a diet, shoving dat piece of chocl8 in his mouth its heaven. Is life so overburdening that we actually find it pleasurable to be rid of the stress?
Another way we find fun is through escape. Into the world of video-games and alcohol. Arsnl fukd up fenerbache on wensday, 5-2, i ws wellll happy, bt its nt lyk ne of wt dat team dus is relavent 2 my lyf is it? i jus woch ftbal 2 escape. im nt reli an assasin working in Damascus during the crusades, but yet i feel pride when i complete a mission on Assassin's Creed. Anywhere else is bliss. It helps to explain why so many don't want to get up in the morning. Most people don't get up easily in the morning not because their body is too tired, but because they're so much happier once they've escaped to their dream state.
I would think that most don't even notice the third path to joy. It seems life in general is he main obstacle to happiness. You can be made numb to life for a certain amount of time or you could run away from it. The third way is to confront life. u gta find sumin 2 liv 4 n drag urself 4 a wyl thru each day, dis is probz da hardest part, dis is wer u wna giv up or run away. bt if u dnt, u overcome life, tings start gettin betr. u even smile wen u see the clouds float seamlessly past. You smile when you see yourself in the mirror, with a toothbrush shoved in your mouth, and you love what you've become. You love the fact that when you step outside on a cold winter's day, the cold hits you like a wall, (a moving wall) even though most walls can't move8-). You even laugh at the cheek of that female driver that didn't stop at the zebra crossing!Dis happy place aint easy 2 stay in tho n soon enuf u slip bak out. u 4gt hw hard it ws 2 gt dat place in da first place n wen u try to get bak in u wnna giv up agen. I suppose we've all entered and left this happy place but its really up to you weva u get back in, weva u sink or whether you swim, fall or stand, run or fight.

Nigerian Death Metal? :S

Music and the English language go hand in hand. Most people today claim to have a passion for music and some even comment as if connoisseurs. It is quite clear to see that music plays a prominent role in the lives of the masses, the art seems to form almost an identity for individuals. What has always left me confused is why English continues to dominate the music industry. Considering music is appreciated all over the world, why is it that the biggest American (and sometimes British) musicians are the most recognised. Do English speakers make the best music? Probably not. Is language even involved in music? It seems only logical that music should be judged on the skill and originality of the musician and their instrument.
Some would argue that music is more than a series of notes on different instruments, but now includes a message that listeners all relate to. If true, this would explain why English speakers would only listen to songs written in English. But why then does the entire world listen to songs that most do not even understand? Also how much can be expressed in the lyrics of a song? Sex, love, hate, happiness and sadness. Anything else?
It seems to me the reason for English being the universal language in global popular music is obvious. Money. Huge record companies that operate in the United States allow for American musicians to be heard all over the world, whereas a Spanish singer may only have resources available to be promoted in Spain. These Pop icons may not even be talented; Britney Spears comes to mind and also Avril Lavinge (I know what you're thinking! Kavi she's Canadian! but she is signed with an American company.) Neither of these women has talent, listen to them live, even i could sing better than that. Yet because of the money provided to these "sexy" young women, they have become internationally renowned. I think its time for music to become cosmopolitan.
Music in other languages appeals to me, only of course if the music is decent enough. Even though i can't understand a word of it, the different language is so different it provides originality that popular music has failed to provide recently. Here are 3 Artists i would encourage to look at:
1) Yael Naim - A French Jew who sings in English and Hebrew. She experienced a slight glimmer of fame when one of her songs was played in an iMac advert.
2) Disiz la Peste - A French Rapper who has an album name "le Poisson Rouge" or the Goldfish, how could you resist?
3) Asala - An Egyptian, who experiments with Arabic jazz and pop, a scary and crazy mix yet surprisingly appealing.

bornos sucks , btw borno is the chemist i workd at

my fingers find the keys on my keyboard so easily, now thats a real example of practise makes perfect, its not like the ordering of letters on a keyboard is anything specific, but the fact i can more or less type with my eyes closed is quite an achievement. SO now as my fingers are bent over this piece of plastic and wires, occasionally they shift to pick up my mug of hot chocoatley warmth, i'm wondering what to write. i was remembering the time wen i had a job, now were those good or bad days? i remember the smile that stained my face whenever i got paid, even though it was really really not enough for an average of 21 hours a week. I also remember coming home absolutely nakkerd everyday. i went to Jas's bday party and i cudnt literally stand up for most of it, which ws ok lukkily bcos no1 knew or cared who the fuk i ws. remember wen the quad ws primarily 2 sets of indepenent groups? awkward times.. we all knew each others names, but conversations rarely crossed the border. remember wen every1 ws fat in lower school? especially peter, simon , merret..sorta:p and clifford, and ofcourse especially myself..man i weigh the same now as i did when i ws in yr 9. Thats shameful. well the caffeine has set in...yh i had coffee in my hot chocolate, and im drowning slowly into the emerging black hole that is depression. drugs have lows. u kno, im depressd like 80% of the time. but were all sick of the pessemistic posts on kavis blog arent we! stop feeling sorry for urself kavi! u kno wt made me laugh? matts blog! yh thats right! im starting a blog war here! and wts ur crap blog gnna do about it? nothing thats right! u dnt even post. the more u can post on ur blog shows how deeps ur personality is...look at merret and george for instance...but peter...sport and politcally incorrect jokes? THATS ALL PETER IS ABOUT! WT A LOSER! just kiddin peter ur great...in a very specific athletic and humourous way... and bringing in back to matt, how about writing ur own stuff! not just working of quotes u find! wt a loser! just kiddin ur great...and unlike peter ur probz gnna read this. that brings me to my blog, depressive ramblings, seemingly original thought thats has ironically become cliched, crappy poetry and inaccurate politics! need i say more? wt a loser! just kiddin ur gr8, i even chek u out in the mirror;) dya kno wt.. wen i think about it.. some of the things that make us laugh reli reli arnt funny.. like the constant black jokes or jews jokes and sexual references.. not funny, just sooooo politcally incorrect it makes us giggle, like sayin bum in primary school. and how many GBs of illegal material is on my PC? i shudnt be sayin that on a blog but still... merret just mentions some band called brand new...so i decide to download an album of theirs.. without payin... im sik to my stomach. how dare i! and how dare the internet let me do that! u kno wts fukkd up... raveethan 4gt his house keys the other day, and i actuli managed to break into his house for him and open the door, and i ws proud of myself! my god. i wna tell u a story of a little girl.. her name doesnt matter, wt does matter is her age, she ws 14 ...OH RIGHT!! GIGGIDY GIGGIDY! thats the end of the story. shud i end this post? i havnt reli written anything memorable yet, and its making me fustrated! wheres the funny kavi wen u need him? in fact i havent seen him since yr 11. i kNoW lets make a rap!
yo yo yo
ur mums a ho
i gt her from behind
and it made her blind?
she ws brilliant
like a polish immigrant
who works as a slave
whoring out on the pave....ment
like wt i did?
gassd it like a yid
the rap that is
and now it fizz...es
oh...yh did it again
and its such a pain
to kno that this rap
is so so so veeeery crap!
kavvizle MC! brruup!

soo? im keepin the day job...but i dnt have one so im pretty much fukkd.

Matt's poem

Here's a poem i wrote for Matt. It's not so good but it'll do i suppose:p


How's it gonna feel when summer ends?
Out of money, out of friends.
How you gonna cope when autumn begins?
No help is around, so you search within.

Alas you find there's nothing inside
But you don't care and you decide
That it seems quite nice to be eternally confined
To float around the depths of your mind.

You stick around noticing the smile
That has crept across your once baron face,
But it leaps away leaving you in disgrace
you remembered the question avoided all the while.

How is it gonna feel when summer ends?
Still out of money and still out of friends.

Left-Wing? Right-Wing? or in the Centre of this poorly categorized bird?

When I heard Naish making some absurd political and mildly racist comments, not only did I feel physically sick but also obliged to teach the ignorant folk something about politics, not all of this may be accurate be what the hell, here we go.

There are three stances most people tend to say they take which are; Left winged, right winged and centred. There are not however ONLY three stances, but an infinite number. Think of it as a number line between -1 and 1m there are 3 numbers;-1, 0 and 1. There are also an infinite amount of decimals in between them. Now this number line isn’t actually a line, it’s shaped like a horse shoe, so left wing and right wing are almost touching. By the way I apologise if you find any of this post patronising.

Let’s start with the left-wing. This wing promotes equality, the idea that everyone is equal in every respect. Therefore a CEO of some huge company would be no less important than a chimney sweep. It also means that no one gets exclusive rights to anything; everything belongs to everyone like a big sharing family. In economic terms the wing promotes total nationalisation, communism in other words. The left wing greatly emphasises the importance of community and togetherness, in a “totalitarian way”.

Now the right wing is very much against the idea of equality, they like the idea of hierarchy where everyone has different roles to play in society. So a Rich businessman would be more important than a chimney sweep. The right wing believes businesses should be owned by individuals, which in economic terms is called privatisation and is basic capitalism. It’s like a family where the father tells the children what to do and gets to make the decisions but has to look after the kids and is responsible for the family’s overall welfare. The right wing also emphasises the importance of community and togetherness but in an “authoritarian way”.

It could seem that the right and left wings aren’t that different; especially as they both promote the idea of a strong community. However, both have different ways of imposing their systems as I have already mentioned, through either totalitarianism or authoritarianism. Totalitarianism is when the state controls everything to keep order and the idea of a national community. This way it ensures disciple and order, things then tend to run smoothly. People are usually free to enter government once elected since all people are equal. Authoritarianism is when the state imposes its authority over all through the government and businesses. They crush rebellion and maintain the hierarchy to keep order and discipline, things runs smoothly when everyone is doing their own specific job. With both wings, there is a limitation placed on rights as they need to strong discipline. This leads me onto the centre.

The centre usually represents liberty, being free to do what you want without any hassle. This may seem good but there is minimal government intervention to fall back onto, so if you become unemployed the government won’t do much except keep you alive. The centre doesn’t really emphasise on the community but rather on the individual, bombarding them with rights so they don’t have to interact with each other, and promoting all to act rationally. The centre tends to promote privatisation but it isn’t rare for some to encourage some nationalisation, a mixed system would make sure most are comfortable with what they need, but not necessarily all they want. At the moment the government is pretty much centre-right with our rights being degraded thanks to the threat of terrorism, but we have been traditionally centre-left with the setting of the NHS and a comfortable welfare system.

If you read all of this I hope it helped :). Some parties offer some pretty convenient policies like safer streets, but make sure which approach they take to it, left or right. You might just end up with something you wish you didn’t wish for.

Writers Block

i kno it sounds silly, but i tink i myt have writers blok. jokes? ive herd that only bad ass mutha fukas get it. so why cant i think of nething to write? must one be in a creative mood to write? if that ws the case i dnt think i wudve got this far. maybe ive written all there is to write, bt thats impossible bcos i speak so freely about nething, why cant i get it down on paper, well on my screen? maybe its cos wen we talk we sorta always talk about the same things, speech is so repatativ, why do i feel the urge to keep my writing original or atleast not to keep makin the same points over and over? has the schools system of essay writing gt 2 me? make a point, go into more detail and give supporting evidence, now thats a paragraph;) bak to the point, i dnt think thats the reason. maybe its quite the opposite. perhaps i have too much to write and im unable to get it all down. its like theres no order of floating pictures in my head but im trying to release all of them at once and theyr gettin jammed at the exit, leaving my fingers just twitching over my keyboard. or maybe ive spent too much of my life thinkin and not enuf time expressing it, the thoughts im trying expressing cud have been at the bottom of all this stored of thought and made a metaphorical tower in my hed collapse. well, ive noticed that on this blog i spend a considerable amount of time talkin about myself, which most other blog authors dont do. i think im just sick of psycoanalysing myself or cant find nething new about myself to tell everyone about. the most probable reason for my mental blok is that im self obsessd. im subconsciously blokkin all thought of other subjects other than myself. i spose it explains why this post has been totally about me. kavi is so awesome.

no UR mother has it got it going on!

riiiiiinng! alarrm bells ringin!! ESCAPE! das wt jordan ws like wen da fire drill went off like 2days ago....lolage stupid whore.. jokes. nehoo i wud like to welkum bak da msn speak;) it makes typin so much easier.but to the point...maybe jordan ws sayin wt were all thinkin...btw i dnt think jordan actuli sed ESCAPE but for the sake of this blog and my convenience lets say she did kk?;) arent we all tryin to escape?? the immense heat of the fire burning your face..its awesome red wings spred across the inside the school, along the corridors, the veins of the bulding, bringing total destruction to all it meets, nothing can be done but to abandon it and think about wt do next. u barge ur way to thru the doors, gazing up at the perfect blue skies...u dare not turn around to see the smoking corpse of the school. the clouds floating effortlessley passin thru the skies makes this warmth surge thru ur body...lol not the fire behind u...its the site of this beauty. the see the black smoke spredding over ur view of the majestic blue sky...u run forward further away from the skl to get away from the smoke, away from the memory of whats there, so u can see the sky, its so nice, makes u feel all fuzzy, u feel time stop, u can just keep ur hed up forever...the warmth in ur stomach, its addictive, a drug, the smoke follows u, u see it covering ur view once again, the building is creeping closer, u feel urself go cold, u need the warmth. u keep runnin to leave the smokes behind, 2 4get wt happnd, to lose urself in the incomprehendable size of the curve of the earth, u dnt care ur neck hurts, u need the warmth. Then u hear callin..frm behind u, from the skl, its callin for attetion, u dnt wnt to go in but u dnt have a choice, its sukkin u bak in, u knew u cudnt stay outside foreva neway, but even stil ur disapointd now the times here.

we always look for tings to help us escape from life, fooball, alcohol, masturbation? just to help us thru the day. its fukkd up wen where u wnna escape to is as bad as ur life is aswell, like wen u get beaten by fukkin hull. like leaving a burning builiding into a another burning building...life sucks. id like to see u comment on this one:p

Would this be poetry if it rhymed?

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I’m afraid of the truth. It scares me to think that there is so much in the world that I don’t know about, so much in the universe that I don't know about. It scares me to think that the world doesn’t actually revolve around me, that if something happens to me nothing will change. I’m scared that when I die, there won’t be a heaven; there won’t even be a hell. It scares me to imagine what it is like when I cease to exist, what it is like not to feel, to move or to think.

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I refuse to believe my life has no meaning. I must exist for a reason. I don’t know the reason but lots of people can offer one, someone has to be right. I refuse to believe that there are freedom fighters, policemen and firemen, all of whom are martyrs who die for no reason. I refuse to believe that I live just for the sake of it. I go to school, pray every night and write on my blog just for the sake of it. I refuse to believe that the most plausible reason for me to live is just so I can die.

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I want to belong. I feel isolated in this cruel world, I want someone to understand me; I NEED someone to understand how I feel and to give me guidance. I want to feel like someone’s got my back, to feel that someone might rely on me, that I’m not the only one who feels the way I do.

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I hate my life. There has to be a reason why my life is so different to everyone else’s. There has to be positive ways I can spin the truth into my favour, and to give me fuel to keep going. My life can’t be this bad without some sort of divine intervention.

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I love my life. There has to be a reason why my life is so different to everyone else’s. Every second of my life is pure ecstasy, and I need someone to thank. The world is so beautiful, everything about it, the birds and the trees, the cars and the trains, the civilisation we have built. It’s all too hard to comprehend that all this beauty is not down to some sort of divine intervention.

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I need a way of explaining what I can’t. So many things in this world are still out of our control, people still suffer and die and we can’t do anything about it. How did existence start? Where does existence end? There is no other answer to all these questions.

Do you know why I believe in god? It’s because I can’t open my eyes to what’s in front of me.

gangsta style!

cap on! sleeves up! GAAANGSTA STYLE! ...hmmm so then...where to start? *awkward silence*.....when i ws 2 i wen out into the road and saw this red thing comin 2wards me...turns out it ws a bus! OUCH! hit me str8, hed smashd blood drippin down my nose...wen i woke up i ws in this dark room with a hot dog in my hand...i thought "a hot dog? if this is hell then satan has a reli reli weird sense of humour...wt a G!" childhood was fun! remember bigbird from sesame st? ws that a guy or a girl..shrug! kids gt it easy now..gameboys hav lil stiks u can use to press tings..also theyre in colour! nehoo there i ws with the hotdog and ther wsnt much in da room, just me and a table, no lights or nething...and i know there ws a table cos i ws lyin on it...smart arse.. nehhoo i gt up and like i cudnt reach the floor, which i ws used to when i ws 2, so i jumpd off but i never touched the floor, just kept falling and falling and falling...and as i ws goin down...and i assumed i ws goin down, i cuda been goin up for all i know i cudnt see nething, well until i started to see the room lighten up...except i wsnt in the room nemore, i ws facing it and my hotdog had gone, instead i had a pair of dice and by now i had completely forgotten about the bus and everything...memories go quikkly innit, infact im surprisd i can remember anything from when i ws 2, i cant even remember yr 9 french! xcept romero lol, i wish i umm..."appreciated" (lol thats the word) women in yrs 7-9 cos i had her for academic reviews and i defo wuda been a naughty bwoi 4 her;) i spose u remember like reli happy and reli sad moments..but like nothin in between..but im not sure where this memory about the hotdog and bla bla fits in cos its not reli sad such...nor happy...nehoo there i ws lookin at the room from the outside, now i cudnt see nething else but this white room. slowly it came towards me, or i moved towards it im nt reli sure, nehoo it came ryt up to my face, and touchd my nose...at the time my nose wsnt as big so it ws reeeeeealll close to my face. i ws kinda scared so i shut my eyes..but i cud somehow see thru my eyelids for a couple of seconds...then it wnt blak...took its time...i think sometime u can do something but it takes like time for ur body to notice it and take effect..u know when u get cut or something and u dnt realise and then later u see the blood or the cut itself..THEN u can feel the pain...sorta like that innit. xcept this ws sliiiiitley different i know but wocha gnna do ay? nehoo i opened my eyes after a couple of seconds and gess wot.....there ws a rainbow..this is wen i realisd i ws gay...nehoo i ws in ireland or somewhere..i had just heard my dad talkin bout ireland b4 the bus incident but i wsnt payin attention cos i ws reppin it with thomas the tank engine, but the name stuck in my name and for some reason i sorta knew it ws ireland..which ws funny cos there wasnt any leprachauns or catholic fundamentalism. so i walkd towards the rainbow but i cud never reach it...i musta been walkin 2wards it 4 like 10 mins..well then green ranger from power rangers poppd out from nowhere and i ws like YAY!!:D he sed hed help me but we had to summon the dragon zord..so he gt out his flute/sword and made that tune!! dooodoodoodoooo! then his mega zord came..how comes the green ranger gt a whole zord to him self...he didnt need it, thats just selfish, and why were there female rangers? if it wsnt a kids show they bl8s wuda gt raped str8 away. especially in those girly scimpy outfits...pink n yellow, it ws jokes how the black ranger ws black...as if he wsnt bright n colourful enuf....i spose they wanted him to stand out.. nehoo i gt into the zord.. and it ws flyin not walkin smashin buildings and shit...and how come the rangers were never arrested? they musta destroyed many a farm, they musta had to paid loooooads in damages or had one stupid insurer...AIG lol. well he took me to the bustop, and tolde me to take the 86 and then walk or take the 364 if i felt lazy, and i ws like kk but y the hell did u drop me in the next place..he ws like this is green street...u gtta learn to gangsta upp!! then he flew off..he ws qrong tho, green st is all freshy and pakified. i cuda been fresh of the boat in a borwn suit and like seagulls still flyin over my hed and still been ayt on green street. nehoo i took the bus home, bak then kids over 8 had to pay 40p but i ws 2 so i didnt...just thought id mention that...well i gt off at the seven kings homebase...and ws like aaaah im home.. then i saw some crowd in the street so i thought i wud walk over to it considering i dint kno where my mum ws. ryt in the middle of the crowd ws my mangled corpse...cliche ay? i ws like shiiiiiiitt that bus wernt playin no games! so i ws like pssh he aint gnna be in rush hour 3 so i walkd home...it took 4eva to get home cos like i had teeny legs...nehoo at that time i ws living on the same road as merrett...i dnt wnna be giving out road names:p but i cudnt do nethin cos like i ws ded innit...so i went to sleep...woke up and wrote on this blog.. walkin around all the time, no1 can hear me... or see me or touch me....which is a downer cos i cant rape ppl...:( ghosts have no fun:( ...wait thats not the end of the story...cos i ws walkin around ilford one day.. i ws well bored cos i ws ded..theres not much to do...so i went to JD and put on all this gaaaangsta clothes on...i gangsta'd up! then i woke up on the floor where the bus had hit me...it ws only a lil teeny bus like the size of my hand, but my bro ws a meean lil dikhed throwin things...so i crossd the road and fukkd him up the only way i knew how...GANGASTYLE!

The Quad

I would say there is a set list of Quad Squad members, and here it is:

• Burns
• Jack
• Josh
• Sam
• Cubitt
• Ruben
• Clifford
• Thomas
• Declan
• Matt
• Peter
• Merret
• Pablo
• Rigby
• Kavi
• Simon
• George
  
• AND TANJIL!

There are some occasional people who wonder in and out that i haven't included for personal reasons:p i hate dipesh..
There are clear areas in which the Quad Squad is split. It is possible to divide the quad into 5 different factions, but with heavy amounts of blurring between them all. These include; The Sporty lot, The Intellectuals, The Spanish Crew, The Music Lot and Drifters.

The Sporty Lot

These guys are clearly passionate about sports, mainly rugby and football, mainly because they're so good at it. 5 out of 6 of these lot are in the School rugby team, if there is still a team, and 2 out of 6 are in the football team. The lot have a clear sense of authority surrounding them as their huge presence is felt and almost feared.

The Intellectuals

A significant portion of the Quad Squad is applying to oxbridge. Although seeming quite appalled by sport-apart from maybe simon and pablo-these group of smart young men can be seen to be quite the opposite of the Sporty lot. However they acquire the same air of control as the big people of the rugby team, but rather through an all-knowing and almost a paternal esscence.

The Spanish Crew

This dynamic trio are origin of the hispanic influences within the quad, although there are probably none. With no other defining qualities other than mumbling the occasional spanish word, the existence of a Spanish crew is debatable, but the trio is loveable none the less.

The Music Lot

"Music in an essential part of life" is often heard from the mouths of musical talents who loiter in the Quad Squad. The either depressive, laid-back or phycotic members of the crew bring a breath of fresh air to the already well ventilated quad, along with fresh gossip and raw bitchiness involving the incompetence of the music teachers.

The Wanderers

By, unsuccessfully, trying to categorize the Quad Squad, i was left with a handful of members who do not conform to the general identities of the other groups. To keep this post and the idea of Quad Factions alive, i have decided to group these people together under the name of Wanderers. In effect all members of the QS are wanderers due to the grotesque amount of blurring between groups, but these lucky few are loved so much by all that they cannot be drawn to any one group.

Fight music...without the music...and without an actual fight..but shud make u angry and thats the point

brrrrrr!!! hear that? its the sound of death..its comin...comin to get u, comin to take u , taking u to the abyss, to eternal darkness. Reach into the depth of ur soul, what do u see? i saw nothing in mine, emptiness, can nothing be defined? how can u have a word for the lack of something? zero. think of zero for a while...think of what it means. it means nothing. i dont think u quite grasp the significance of that. infact stop thinkin. if u can i doubt u can, close ur eyes and think of nothing, not black not silence, nothing. incomprehensible. i hate things i cant understand. thats why i hate dipesh i cant understand how that nigga gt so fat hahahaha! lolll! not funyyy but nigga gtta laugh hahah? u kno wt els i hate. u! why the fuk u reading this go fuk off! im just kiddin , i NEED u , if u dont read this then this doesnt exist , I dont exist....if no1s around to hear a tree drop in a forest does it make a noise? no it doesnt , life is perception, wt u dnt sense doesnt exist. everything ceases to exist every time i fall asleep. bull shit i cant believe i just wrote that hehehehehe i cant think str8 just typing wt i think im thinkin but im not sure no time to stop tho, gtta do something, if i dont keep typing im gnna hurt something, probably myself JOKES! i wonder how long it wud take some1 to notice that i ws ded if i ws to kil myself ryt noww......probzz bout 24 hours... actuli its friday probz bee aboput monday mornin. my mother comin to look for to get me out of bed, she screams calls the ambulence starts to cry, blames her self. such terrible thoughts, stuk in my hed, gtta get them out, get them on this blog, give them to some1 else, keep my self pure. nice and rainbowy, all sweet and chocolately, laughin hahah look at me laugh im all happy. happy happy kavi...kinda rhymes dont it hehe, god i hope i explode, wts takin those fukkin swiss ppls there time. i shud b ded in some blak hole by now, uuughh im so bored, lost in dark thought. i hope im not scaring u , i wud never wnna do that. or maybe i wud i dnno. i wonder wt it feels like to jump off a cliff...i hate heights, i look down i get so close to daring myself to jump off...wud it be such a bad idea to do it? yh it probz wuud, it wud be a terrible mess to clean up. ravz i hope u dont read this...actuli i do or i wudnt have just written that hehehehe im gnna im gnna sink like a brik in custard hehe yellow, yellow is such a weird colour, u know how do i know that the colours i see are the same as the colours that every one else sees? my blue cud be ur red...u cud be seeing a red sky but u wud call it blu...how can u have favrit colours, rmemebr in primary skl,,,,, my favrit colour ws gweeen . fukin little kids cant say their R's gnna unleash gary glitter on u mutha fukkers UNLEASH THE BEAST! all seems dead on the surface, but its screamin underneath...haha thnx coldplayyy cudnt have put it better my self....always look at things from twice, things are wt they seem ahhaha look at joseph lansdown, hes a ticking bomb hahaha hes gnna explode propa asian stylleeeeee. life is jokesss a bitt too funny if u ask me, its gettin full of its self, its a sell out, gettin too popular its time to bring it down, teach it a lesson keep it in line, propa tory style, kik the shit out of it till it obeys. thats why he have laws tho...wt law does life obey?? huh! BITCH! does wt the fuk it likes rude bwoi mutha fukka! why not wear a fukkin hoody u dikhed?!! hide ur fukkin head in shame fukin ugly dik! but u dont stop do u? spring to summer to autumn to winter to spring to summer yh real real original u dum fuk. dnt try n switch it up with that global warmin shit. who u tryna fool? get a real job! im a hypocrite, i need a real job, i need to sort my hed out..switch it up, stop wastin my time on fukkin blogs . stop drinkin coffe that stuff is fukkin me up, cant sleep cant close my eyes, cant think or cant stop thinking ARGH! hahahah jokes! u know wts jokes? yh i dnno i thought u cud help, why are u still reading this? this post has no structure or theme...but dont stop, or no1 will see these letters and they wont exist except in memory..memories FUK ME UP!! i hate them! they keep u living in the past. the past isnt good. the future isnt good and the present is defo not good. but the past is the worsstt. u need them tho or ur messd up in the present or future and makes me fukkin angry! i need to stop them following me, i got rid of asians following me,,, why not memories, why cant u be a dikhed to ur self ? cos ull be left isolated. an amolie haha thanks mr jenkins and politics ....shud i stop? this is probz gnna be a long post , i cant tell cos i havent publishd, ugh my fukkin wrist...too much typing maybe i shud just cut it ....ponies rainbows kittens moonlight romance poetry ..PEACE

so whats the deal with baked beans?

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nice english sucks

kk my last post floppd cos it ws in nice english!!urgh!! if u wnt nice english PLZ go to matts blog www.isitworththeaggravation.blogspot.com its like this one but betr. Sure is nyc to be typin lamely agen i feel like a free blak slave..and i can say tht without like seemin racist cos im half black and west indian......wow im lost for words...writers block? i didnt think that existed b4 but i dnt think its that they cant think of anything to ryt i think its that they have too much cant get it all down. thats sorta wt happnd to me wen i tried to write it nice english, it took waaaay long and i cudnt order my thoughts. sometimes i wonder theres loooadsa stuff i think about or whether theres nothing..i mean i like staring at things but i dnno whether im thinkin while i do it or just like sorta ded. i look at the sky alot, its sooo big its cool, it calms me down cos it reminds me how small i am compared to the rest of the universe, wt i do is soo insignificant to existence. lotsa ppl in skl are prooppper workaholics and i dnt wnna name any names...*cough* manish *cough* i mean u gtta chill sometimes!! they dnt make me as angry as the ppl who are never workin but turn out to be uuuuuber smart, like kavi 8-)..... sarcasm if u cudnt tel.. im still quite sarcy even tho i dnt find it funny nemore, i have an odd sense of humour. and wt i find funny, is that wen i try to be funny i naturally stop laughing cos like i hate ppl who laugh at their own jokes..how sad! but wen they laugh u sorta becom obliged to laugh along with them or theyll feel bad. i dnt like makin ppl feel bad..but it seems im sorta naturally do it, so i try to keep quiet most of the time so i dnt seem like a prik..u kno wt i realised? this post has been mainly about me...lets talk about U now...well if ur reading this ur probably going out with vaishna or going to join the army:p...yh hows that workin out 4 ya?;)

good english and political?:S

Wordizzle! I thought I'd post once again on this rather boring blog because it seems i have some competetion from none other than matt. Also i thought it would be a nice idea to write this post in nice and lovely standard English. It seems a lot harder to think of things to write about right now, the correct spelling is keeping me in some sort of formal mind frame and i can't seem to escape into the glorious world in which i usually live in. All i can really think of is how much i hate the U.S.A. Everyone loves Obama don't they and it is pretty hard not to really, he's so god darn adorable. However, people tend to forget, and pardon my language...HE'S A FUCKING YANK! You can't trust him. He might seem nicer than Mr McCaine but remember that compared to the rest of the world he's not such a nice guy. Do you know who is? KAVI:D I'm going to run for Prime Minister soon so i'm going to be counting on you for votes. War on the U.S.A and getting rid of the vote for women are my main policies.

Dudes and dudettes....i cant sleep, any other reason i wud be posting on this lame blog? its all that coffe i drunk at starbux 2day, it ws goooood:D also i ws glad that i didnt hav any of it thrown at me like mikky and alex, wt losers!!clifford messes up ppls clothing, hes ripd like 2 of my shirts broken my shoes, rippd the pokets of georges blazr and rippd his tie!he doesnt know his own strength, and i wonder how he gt that strong in the first place? i dnt think he goes to the gym. gyms sound kinda lame to me, y wud u pay some1 to lift things??if u were a construction worker ppl wud pay u. and these guys earn loads aswell, some times they earn like £20 per hour! thats uber loads!they dnt even do that much work it makes me sick. u kno wt else makes me sik?ppl who like cars..soz stacey.. but cmon!! a cars a car! the only real difference is the colour. how they can talk about cars for so long on top gear on a regular basis i hav no idea, they must put some porn in the show to keep ppl interestd. jeremy clarkson is loserr aswell. that guy destroys the environment and is proud.wt kind of beast is proud of that?proud that his kids will probably choke to death bcos 4X4s are becomin more popular? i like how those adverts are always sayin that theyr doin their best to make more fuel efficient cars and how they care about mother nature...LOL thats just silly ofocors they dnt care but they try to mask it so that it seems they do. honda dnt even talk about cars!! they talk about robots and sky diving like thats gt something to do with what theyre sellin. i like those alcohol ads cos they kno wt theyr sellin...the pure destruction of brain cells in a bottle/can. WKD ads are the best cos they know wt guys do...but i gtta say if ur an alki u wudnt reli be like that....ud probably beat ur wife or something..good times.apparently in japan they have bars that dnt sell alcohol but smells insted:S thats kinda weird, only in japan right? y wud u pay to smell things? only a 4 yr old child wud admit that wen they go out they wnna go "smelling". japanes ppl are crazy, they have weird anime porn and stuff and weird original films. why is it so cool do be original now? ppl act certain ways becos over time we have learnt that thinking or acting in these ways are praaaaactical..so why do we reli need to think out the box? infact with everybody tryin their best to be original the most truly original ppl are those who think practically and traditionally..god bless the BNP! i dnt understand why so many ppl hate politics. its so exciting, its like eastenders or big brother but in suits. loads of disfunctional ppl stuff in a chamber and every 5 years ppl are evicted. i gt and A in government in politics..woo! go me! but now i think about it...wt a useless subject! its not like the country is run like it shud be, its just power hungry freaks doin wt they like. every one hates gordon brown....bcos theyre told to....most ppl cudnt tell u why they do. thats why u shud never judge a book by its cover. but sometimes its natural. i ws walkin past waterstones and i saw in the front window a book called "sex and more sex"...hmmm i wonder wt thats about? a thrilling read i wud presume. its reli weird how loads of ppl have become reli weird. look at russel brand, hes reli funny, but whoah!!! freaky deaky! that guy in the mighty boosh aswell! i totali think the nerdier one is funnier cos hes soo cool and sorta reminds me of george! i kno he gets alot of slack but i think george wudnt be as cool if he wasnt ginger. its just makes him shine. like the sun on a clear summers day..we see the sun less n less now, but its well hot alot of the time...tis global warming! it wellll hot atm and it ws like raining..and its solely thanks to jeremy clarkson..if i see that man on the street im gnna shake his hand...i myt choke, but warm weather makes me feel at home, all i need now is a monsoon season.

Typing helps me control my thoughts... cos like it makes u put all the ideas floating around in ur big ol hed into like some order and also u dnt have to spell proper so u can think that thought by typing it reli reli quikkly, and also u can move on unlike in ur hed where u think half a thought and u myt come bak t it l8a. also u can say things that dnt make sense and ppl dnt look at u funny cos they cant see u, unless u have a webcam, but webcams are sorta a waste of money anyway, there just for lazy ppl who dnt have "real" friends to go out n see so they see them on msn or some other computer thing. also ppl cant tell ur asian or blak wen u type, all they see are the words which is a good thing cos apparently like 75% of ppl who say they arent racist actuli are but they cant help it, its some natural psycological ting, says my brother anyway but he like lies all the time and says things up to make me angry. But i dnt get that angry anymore, i use to like have proper anger issues, i mean just ask ravee i used to shout at him sooo much that even his mum felt the heat, mainly cos all the criticism was aimed at her. she seems nicer now she can speak english and she laughed at me wen she first saw my long hair, sed that i "had style" in tamil, i dnno whether it ws a sarcastic insult cos like tamil ppl dnt show emotion wen they speak in tamil, maybe thats why i didnt like her wen she cudnt speak english, who knows? turns out ravee did reli well in his as lvls, he gt AAAAC it seems the rather sarcastic name burns gave him of "brains" ws well justified. My mum keeps buggin me like ravees mum does to him but not as much. she always quotes my dad when she tries to get me to do things like " kavi ur dad says wash the dishes" LOL my dad wud never say that, he knows im an asian MALE, i have no place in the kitchen. my rentz are actuli sexist, its part of the asian package i spose. also i think theyre sliiitley racist, sometimes wen im about to leave for skl my mum wud say " look out for blak ppl" i mean thats just nt calld for.. i mean i look out for them any way but y wud u say that out loud?!!?does she wnna get shankdd?