english teacher

"skool ti naht redrah s'ti ,sdrawkcab gnitirw yrt anng m'i os" - gaelic poet

so.... hey again, history coursework is over, so im finding myself with an increasing amount of spare time. so the first challenge when writing a blog post is... u guessed it! thinking of something to talk about! there really are so many things one can talk about, but its the selection of that one special topic that makes a blogpost worth while. so today im gonna talk about clouds. i see no reason why not, we see them pretty much every day. also its important to work some sort of humour or like a message to make the reader smile atleast once. funny topics include; long words, pain, racism, sexism and in general rebelling against conventional society through words.

Clouds
I saw a cloud 2day, actuli more than one, like a gazillion. it was beautiful. but it was laughin at me, that whorish ball of liquid. so i thought allows it then, ill be the bigger man and walk away, but that muther fuker followed me all day, changing size and colour. so wen i got off the train and realised it was still following me i sed, look dude, im a bamf yh so dnt mess wit ayyyyyyt? then i walkd off. but that fat ass mutha fuka decided to spit at me! the nerv! who repeatedly spits at ppl? honestly! and it wasnt just me aswell! it ws spittin at this random, and rather peng, lady on the other side of the road. but she ws like puttin up with this bullshit and pulld out some uber umbrella. now im not the richest guy, i dnt evn buy lunch.... well i say that... but still im not middle classd. perhaps in the heart i am but thats besides the point. i cant be goin round buyin umbrellas and coats just cos one jackass feels like hes gnna show everyone whos the big man around here. so any way i walkd home.

now analysing that passage, its quite obvious of what the cloud represents, the burden of newly found adolescent responsibility. lol? soz i only had like 5 mins. peace

Rubenism

For the love of god, i hope Ruben does not find his way to this post. Not that i fear i will offend but purely because the overwhelming process of self-realisation may prove to be too much for his frail emotional being. There are 4 main tenets to Rubenism:

1. Emotional fragility
2. Dull conformism
3. Delayed conformism
4. Hyoocrisy

Emotional Fragility
To be masters of one's emotions is a tricky challenge, with hormones flying through a young and sexually charge teenager. The outmost rejection of self-control is the pinnacle of Rubenism and is a by-product of all the other tenets. It is often argued that this trait is not a way of thinking in itself, but is inevitable in the life of an every day Rubenist. Regardless of petty classification, the instable nature of one's mind is the rejection of one's self and off society, an attack on the conformism Rubenist strive to defend and enhanced by the realisation of hypocrisy.

Dull Conformism
Conformism is essential to everyday life, and is the force that binds all humans together. However unsubstantial or "Dull" conformism is often seen as parasite of modern progress. Attacking orinality, it stops people thinking differently and stops the cogs in a pluralistic society. Rubenists disagree and believe the path to hapiness is through community and total secularisation.

Delayed conformism
The average Rubenist does not just conform but also wait to see the effects of certain conformations. Just as Peter the Great took on western ideas after being tested in the west, Rubenism encourages tested conformity. However, this is not a check to avoide inpracticle conformal values, but a test to see how popular it is. Rubenism supports the idea of democracy and that the majority is always right.

Hypocrisy
With the rebellious nature of teenage behaviour, there is the notion of anti-conformism being a promoted philosphy. However to conform to the concept of non-conformism would be outright hypocrisy. It is this that starts the vicious cycle of Rubenism. The self-hate started by self-analysis leads to emotional fragility and the search for comfort amongst peers, which can only be received through conformity. The wound is so deep however, that the Rubenists have to conform so extensively leading to dull conformism. The intense conformism leads Rubenists falling behind recent trends and analysing the spread of new ones. All in all the conformity leads to hypocrisy starting the cycle once more. Rubenism leads to anger and hate.



NOTE TO ALL
This is not to be taken literally or with any sort of seriousness. This is a JOKE!!!
peace

so I this its didnt brings time realise me to how to get hard my all this conclusion. experimental was colours on going are ur to fun arses, be lol. mmmhmm ah have damn man u right im ever mutha in wondered fuka. way if actuli over people this my see isnt head. colours so hey exactly crazy, thats the reminds loser same me talk, way of i as the bet you davinci jesus code do? reli. never ofcourse i sed reckon you reading that.have, this its i is time really quite to do tedious face so patronize ill the y'all probz music dont stop and i in lol.the dance.:p near lol future yeah peace

Peace

fragmented poetry

comic relief day 2day...wt a joke.

how comes an ice-cube never has sharp corners?
questions like that keep me up at night. insomnia.
just kiddin, i sleep like a baby. constantly urinating....

caffeine fuks up ur body clock... so does BST but its unpatriotic to complain about that
whats there not to love about a nation that voted in thatcher
that profitted of the slave trade
that is involved in torture in guantanamo bay...not that i wud kno
i kno fuk all

i like french...but i hate french...
i wnna speak bt i dnt wnna learn..
laziness man
i blame the algerians

its never good to not say what u feel
thats why im ill
thank god for calpol
strawberry goodness
7+ includes adults right?

my hand hurts
and makes weird noises
too much masturbating
cover up the serious problem in my hand with a joke
run away pussyole, did it again

this blog is takin on a poet like structure
lots of lines
short sentences
they best put this in the anthology
wen im poet laureate
......
lol dont laugh

im gnna be a lawyer
wt a white elite subject
ironic how the legal system is rife with such injustice

im a foreigner in my own country,
still,
its not racism
its just nature
im not a guy
im an asian guy

u kno a guy has no life wen he has a blog
xcept me
i dnt conform to the analysis in my own ramblings

noones special u kno...
just thought id say
what a shit day
nothing a lil comic relief cant fix..
wt a joke!

Therapy 2

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Therapy

Fuck you!

a christmas carol

waap waap! so im on my old pc 2day, kinda nostalgic. i gt all my old emots, and my internet explorer remembers everything! on my new pc i get it to clear histry all the time to hide my porn trail. its funny how differently i act around my family, cos even tho im pretty much a loner at home as well, i tend to be more polite and ..umm lets say "traditional" in my choice of conversation topics. i used to spend more time with my family like in yr 8 n all, thats cos i didnt have many friends. not much changed i spose, but still, shit happens. its when we get improvements in life that we start to 4get about things that helped us in the past, like parents or a virus infested PC. but we musny dwell on the past 2 long or we'll end up living in a fantasy parralell universe ( i hav no idea how to spell parallel!) wt a fukkin stupid word!

Year 13 has had its ups n downs i spose, im not reli enjoying skl atm, but theres only one more year to put up with i spose. theres so much cwk demanded at the same time, its unbelievable! u wud think that exam board that specialise in students education wud understand theres a problem now, but NOOO they refuse to help, fukkin darwininianism! thats wt it all comes down to. that even why the tories are bangin on bout bankers bonuses. bankers fukkd up, they shud die, not be rewarded! its just not natural. to be fair theres a contractual implications to be jumped over, but u kno why tories dont mind that? cos tories are contract breachers...because plain n simply, theyre CRIMINALS!

next yr im hopefully goin to soton to study law...YAY! wt were the chances of a poor asian boy entering an elite subject like law, "thanks new labour;)!" as soon as labour needs advertisiing im there:D u kno in like 20 years wen were all rich, wel except u tanjil, ur gnna be sponging of the state i can tell, its called karma. anyhoo wen were all rich u reckon were gnna be talkin about the recession as we talk about the great depression. imagine all the things that have happend while were alive, the millenium, 9/11, the first black president.... all these things are gnna be in histry books, edexcel is gnna have a hard time makin that shit interesting. i wnder in 1919, if someone thought it wud be boring to talk about the recent past in the vast inter-galactic future. i wonder wt technology theyll be then, i hope we have jet packs! god i hate the enviroment:p oh yh global warming wt a fukkin joke! the globes gettin hotter so theres the heaviest snowfall in 20 years..... global warming is a load of bullshit!

rainbows!!!

Richard of York gave battle in vain

lol

so....arsenal drew again, that really sucks. y do i even woch football , i jst end up sad:( but then again everything makes me sad. i tried to take prozac the other day, but it was abosorbd by a black hole. freaked the shit outa me. maybe if i gt my arse off this PC i wudnt be so depressd. lol there are so many tissues in this room my rentz must be real dum if they dnt realise why:P teenager + the internet... ive bunkd so many maths lessons this term, i just cant stand my lessons. wills is just like a robot, but i have to admit a good mathematical and nice robot, but he doesnt make maths fun. jeshram on the other hand...god shes so hot i cant focus on my txt book, and its well embaressing if she calls me to the board cos im all hunched 8-). i dnt like those new interactive white boards, they always fuk up. u gtta log in and then u gtta configure the pen to the screen, its just a waste of time. u kno teachers get to go on wteva website they want to at skl? if a teacher ever forgets to log out just once... im gnna search for sooo much child porn on theyr account. thats how i gt rid of mr clarke;) i remember goin paintballin with clarke, there ws loadsa porn in the ichs mini van, and also a small filopino boy in a cage at the back. the new van is propa chuung, all big n shiny. how comes the skl gets cool things wen were about to leave, like the sports hall, PE wuda been much more fun in yr 7 bein able to play table tennis rather than be the goalie outside. is it like nature to put fat kids in goal? i suppose on a purely physical sense, they wud blok more of the goal. but still.... i used to hate PE, especially the teachers. havin a bunch of tubbies tellin u that ur too fat is rong on 2 levels. if u cant work them out then ur dum, if u can work out more levels then ur thinkin 2 much, get a life! are unhealthy doctors hypocrites? they DO take the hippocratic oath n all. yh that ws bad, but im strangely proud of that:p i need to get funnier, sayin anal or just talkin about sex in general isnt funny anymore. what makes something funny tho? if i say something outrageous then ppl laugh, if only to be polite. if tony blair says it hes bastard. no wait im goin off topic here. what makes something funny. pain usually makes ppl laugh, and thats sick, really really sick, in principle. irony is also a funny ting. but thats bout it. hmmm. WAIT A MINUTE! i swer ive asked this question b4! ugh how uncool of me. ther ws me goin on about non conformism and originality (previous posts) and now this. god my mother wud be ashamed. if she read this blog, and i hope she doesnt. not that shes literate. or ever leaves the kitchen. my mum is a saint really but my god is she naiive. shes genuinely a racist, but like shes a polite racist. basically shes like UKIP. and dnt gimme that crap that ukip are strictly nonracist, thats bullshit. it reli is. if u have UK in ur name then ur racist. actually thats probably not true. im reli paranoid about racism u kno, cos there are stupid ppl out there. wen ur wyt its kk, cos racists wnt hurt U , but wen ur ethnically different. actuli thats rong aswell. white ppl are the target of sooo much racism, its ridiculous. lol once again my post drifts on to politics and society. only smart arses talk about politics malheuresment. oh yh btw ges who 2nd in france? in ligue 1...thats right PSG! brup zoop bullet! they came 17th last season by a point and now theyr second. why do i chek the results of french football i hear u ask? cos its less depressin than english football. i wnna see paris. i went with my mum b4 but she ws too scared to go to the top of the eiffel tower. sigh! i wnna see europe in general. and by europe i mean western europe, none of that soviet crap. and i spose greece aswell. i still cant believe how many ppl go on holiday once a year. its like whoah! do u hate ur life at home that much? and only middle classd ppl can afford it so i reli reli dnt understand. if they go to interesting places then thats kk , but like if u go to rhodes or ibiza where its pretty much a british colony but with drugs and sex on the beach, i reli dnt see the point. i wnt ever understand the mind of middle england. lol middle england...sounds like it belongs in lord of the rings. that ws some loooong film, and i didnt even understand wt ws goin on half the time. ppl just killin each other and some nice musik. i remember i had the game (illegally) on ps2, that ws kinda fun. im such a criminal. wts worse? a relatively poor kid stealin binary imformation worth thousands of pounds (over several years) or a middle classed youth have under aged sex and drinking under age? actuli the age limits things are reli hard to justify. cos its sorta a personal thing. i mean if a girl starts havin her period at like 13 , shes naturally ready for sex. right? oh i dnno! rememebr that chavvy kid who had sex wen he ws 12. the mother ws weelllll ugly. im nt tryin to be mean, but my god. darwin must be rong about natural selection cos surely ugly genes shud be extinct by now, how cud u possibly have sex with something that hideous!? i cud say a joke here about any of number of girls, and im talkin to all u readers directly here... u kno who u are! but im nt in the mood to be annoying. u kno wt IS annoying? people. i reli hate ppl. not specific ppl, but just like ppl. kno wt i mean? i bet u dont. lol ur probably wondering if u shud be offended:p i dnt understand why ppl socialise, cos to expand ur social horizons u have to act so fukkin desperate. ur pretty much whoring out ur personality. i dnt like to do that. or maybe im just bad at socialising. meh:p yh u kno ur a loner wen u have a blog! lol...im crying on the inside. i like my blog, its like having a conversation with my self and being as bitchy as i wnna. and wen ur boring person a blog is ur only friend, but sometimes it actuli spits at u. yh! my pc screen spat at me once, so i banged it out. then we made up and looked at porn. i look at 2 much porn but it keeps my testosterone levels down. i used to have anger issues, now not so much;) also my arms are as strong as ever, its good exercise, especially with my size;) lol:p i make myself laugh some times. thats cos i kno wt i mean wen im sayin something. i kno merrett has trouble deciding whether im lying or not, but its quite simple to tell. if i answer something wen im not asked directly then its the truth, if u ask me something then its probably a lie. maybe im lying now. yh sorta. u cant trust a blak person. my dad says never trust an irishman with ur money. on the contrary mikky gives me sooo much money, he cus pretty much blackmail me at any time. damn tories. i reli hate middle classd ppl now. not all of them, but most:p quite funny how about 99% of the quad are middle classd... i dnt hate them all, just 99% of them:p i wonder if im actuli middle classd or not. cos the working class works... my mum works, reli reli hard. my dads a lazy fuck. i used to have a job and i workd like a donkey. on all fours alllllright gigiddy gigiddy! one way i think u can tell is by ur diet. the more u eat the richer u are i suppose. but then again i used to be reli fat. hmmm. a lil help marx? marx ws a prik. firstly he ws german. 2nd he ws a member of the nazi party and thirdly he ws a TV chef. god hes like satan. i ws reading about satanism the other day. its not reli spooky like i thought, theyre just anti-god, almost humanitarian, but in a religous form:S i dnt reli understand, but u kno...actuli u dnt so nevr mind. well i think ive talkd to my self long enuf, if uve red this far i congratulate u and urge u to comment, even if to swear at my mother. peace out.

My head hurts, so instead of a real post, i'll just try to give you a little insight

my hed hurts:( 2 much football. music soothes the pain. but i can take the pain. im a REAL man. woof! punctuation fucks up english. i try to use as little as possible. oh the irony. i lack confidence. i feel like criticising my own blog. once more. i need to stop that. i need to stop over sleeping. as well. as being harsh on my self. i ws watching something. i think it was on bbc. yh it defo was. cos it was horizon. shit about body clocks. its not teenagers' fault. they need to over sleep. theyre not lazy. i shud stop insulting jasons laziness then. actuli i dnt. do i? who doesnt?ugh! my hed hurts:( 2 much football.

1) I love looking up - try lookin up right now, ur probly lookin at some ceiling cos ur inside but even thats quite interesting. patterns or paint? outside is the sky, and that really is beautiful, i cud stare at the sky for hours. u notice slight differences each second u stare. its so big, i love the feeling when u comprehend that u are so unimportant in the ways of the universe, takes off the pressure;)

my hed hurts:( 2 much football. i thought i'd drink some hot chocolate to help. seems to be be doing the trick. not that soothing a headache is much of a trick. if a mgician did that. at a party. it wouldnt be very amusing. unless it was in a hospital. lots of people hate hospitals. i wud love to stay in a hopsital. u can just do fuck all. sitting there. i cant do that at home. i get told to do things. since when did doing things help. me. do any thing. lol? doing things is so overrated. but im soo jelus of active people. cos they can be arsed to do things. i need iron tablets. but alot of them arent vegetarian. keepin my conscious clean is more important. than my health. ugh! my hed hurts:( 2 much football.

2) I scrutinise everything i do. i've a habit of defending the undefensible, just to be different. I even argue with myself. in my head theres a constant dialog just explaining why whatever im doing is stupid. "why are u having a shower? u had one yday! people are dying of thirst in africa and ur cleaning ur alredi clean body with how much water? u bastard!" the man in my head isnt very nice....

my hed hurts:( 2 much football. i cant focus. george keeps talkin to me on msn. along with others. who i care less about. but i cant focus on any of them. too many windows. and then theres this. this blog. u kno wt are good about blogs? they let people who dont know u. to kno u more. too bad i dnt hand out this addy 2 easily. i only like ppl who know me. 2 read my racist remarks. keep my external facade. of a lovely young man. not that im seen that way. but i wudnt know. speaking of ppl. that i know. sluts sluts sluts. and on a completley different topic. dutch dutch dutch. ugh! my hed hurts:( 2 much football.

3) i have a huge ego - my god is it big! bigger than mussolini. im the greatest thing thats happened to this universe. fuk wt i sed b4 about my insignificance, im the muther fukking mesiah! but seriously, it sickens me when i realise im looking down on people. i have nothing really.

cola has caffeine!!??

so they call me mellow yellow...quite WRONGLY! im not chinese! u kno wt? i feel kinda depressd:( caffeine + the fray = lol...
life doesnt change reli but ppl sure do. its reli crap wen u figur out uve changed, for the worse. that u need to change ur approach to life to suit the new you. its like coping with a disability. thats right, growing up is just like gettin more and more disabled! god i type some really good material. no one gets sarcasm anymore. its not cool. its reli mean actuli. i like irony tho. its like UKIP. like the bnp but not so mean. and once again your right, i just compared sarcasm to racism. its quite sad that i lol at my own blog. im a genius. cant anyone be a loner anymore without being cool? joseph isnt just a loner, hes the coolest kid in school. infact hes not a loner, hes just "independent". people dont give into peer pressure, theyre just "open minded". people arent racist they just want british job to go to "three generation british families". god its so complicated. u kno how i kno that god doesnt exist? cos ive been brought up throught the philosophy of logic. logic is the ultimate truth. using logic is only logical. ofcourse any ideological thought allows space for its existence to be maintained. what am i sayin? that we're all brainwashed capitalists at heart. nah not reli. welll.. yh we reli are. thinking is not good. the less u think, the easier life is. cos things dont make sense if u think about them. wt good is a senseless world. so go to church, take in spoonfuls of truth. i mean we're all fed truth in school, but thats not silly. mannnn my posts a repetative! i need to freshen things up. but to do that i need to take a blog break.hmmm. ill see how things go. i think ill leave this post for now. peace out. but if i do take a break, ill do a "funny" post b4 i go:p peace out;)

mood swing

waap waap! the sound of a duck. or quack for all u conformists. insult? you know what, lets drop all this metaphysical non-sensical oddly punctuated blogpost format food for thought crap and get down to business. .... but i have no business as i have no purpose or meaning in this illusion of a universe...ah crap i did it again! its so easy to over complicate things. look at asian people for instance. some "uncle" doesnt wnna come over from whatever civil-war infested crap hole of a country he lives in. so then "uncle number 2" takes huge offense and starts taking polical procedures in which to control a faction and to discredit "uncle"... lol? well lets try an example closer to home. a year 13 student in ichs gets rejected from UCL...now hes messed up his entire life, and his life long desire to be a doctor has now dissapeard. firstly that desire was never there... secondly its not the end of the world... go work in a call centre. u kno why chavs dnt get drunk easily? cos they dont have any more brain cells to destroy. i ws savin that one for clifford but the fuk wit spends most of his time in the mines these days. waste of tax payers money funding education for those class confused bastards. whoooah! how neo-conservative of me! i reli dont understand how people can be so happy. theres nothing to be happy about. there reli isnt.


so ive officially given up coffee guys! it was just too serotonin sucking and tainted with exploitation... still shop at primark tho... thats for pointing that out mikky... fukkin anarchists..why dont they realise that by lecturing people about anarchism theyr going against theyr whole beliefs.. btw i wasnt labelling mikky as an anarchist... hes just a wannabe... not as much a wannabe as clifford i mean jeeees fukkin usss... actuli ive pikkd on clifford enuf.


well this is gnna be my first post of february. its been a long time coming, and quite frankly i already feel this is a dissapointment. so as i write eating a penguin chocl8 biskit thing, i worry for the future of this blog. oh u wnna hear the joke on the bak of the penguin? why cant penguins fly? cos theyve have evolved wings which help them to swin and some would aruge that they can "fly" in water which is equally as useful. i didnt get it. a little note to tanjil: i hope you enjoyed/noticed the penguin i placed in your pocket. in return i hope you will now consider not prolonging the inevitable meeting to take place between me and that dutch slut...and he lovely daughter of whom you have such strong relations.

skins starts in 10 so im gnna finish this quik. u kno i dont like how no1 els has written on their blogs. infact i may consider going on strike until someone else posts. although i doubt it will actually make a difference, its the principle that counts. thats what gandhi taught me. and also if u wnna guilt a whole load of asians.. starve yourself. actually u'd just fit in more. damn malnurished indians. so chinese ppl are weird arent they. theyr not reli considered "ASIAN" xcept in yankland. u kno chinese food is traditionally vegetarian or like has random animals in it like dog. same with indian food really. xcept like bengali fish. the british fuk everything up. israel, iraq, the slave trade. they just cant contain them selves.

well i have to go, i promise to make a better post later in the month. but if no one else starts posting soonish im gnna go on strike!!! peace out!

A Guide to Social Hierachy

A Guide to Social Hierarchy

Foreword

As I will come to explain later, being the reader of this post you will approach this writing differently that someone who did not who i was. If you don't know who I am on a personal level then my words of advice would be for you to do something other read the blog of unknown teenager as it would affect your social standing if it were to be ever found out. To the readers who do, please forget for the time in which you read this passage. Thank you.


Definition

The core aspect to social hierarchy is, and always will be, the definition of a person. The accepted definition of an individual will decide the way in which that person will be perceived by others. Once defined, it is usually very hard for one to part with that definition without dropping down the hierarchy. The process of definition usually occurs within the first minutes of social interaction with someone already well established on the social ladder. Personality is by no means the only factor involved. Factors including social history, financial history, wit and intellect are also taken into account. Although individual perceptions may change, eventually through social speculation (gossip) a general consensus is built up and then fixed around that person. Definition rarely changes as society is built of self-serving individuals. By exposing a radical opinion, one risks damaging their own position. However, change is not impossible, but is usually incredibly slow.

Social Evolution

Not only is the individual subject to definition but also the ladder itself. Thus, the ladder is also open to gradual change. Although the defining process still occurs, the attributes deciding position in the hierarchy change. This is called social evolution. As history shows, ideas and perceptions change over the years. This progress is also made on the short term social scene as well. A change in definition will therefore not guarantee a change in social rank if it correlates with social evolution. It is argued however, that "ageing" rather than evolution would be a more appropriate word. Since different social parts change at different rates and in different ways I feel evolution would be better fitting as social groups change in order to ensure the survival of the group. If social groups were unable to evolve it may lead to social REvolution which would destroy the ladder itself. Considering the ladder is not a strictly singular form, it cannot choose to evolve, but its leading members tend to take steps towards conserving the existing form through satisfying reform. It is the idea to reform and to preserve social advantages of the high social class that keeps society a perpetual organism.

Social Hierarchy

There are four main ranks in the social hierarchy; Monarchs, citizens, peasants and outcastes. Only through the workings of definition is one placed on the social hierarchy. A major factor in the determination of position is social history. This is the amount of influence one carries before being defined. If one has more social links when being defined then their spot is going to be higher. This leads us to one of the fundamental rules of social importance "rank α no. of social links", your social position is directly proportional to how many friends you have. Society is one super structual molecule, with an almost an infinite number of individual atoms. The more links each atom can make with other atoms, the higher their stability is within the molecule. So by increasing the number or friends you have, your definition will keep getting higher, dragging the consensus of your definition higher as well.

The behaviour of each rank within society is different. Monarchs are occupied only by the consolidation of their position. Being so high up the "food chain" provides influence and authority, which is an advantage to any person. This leads me to the "paternal theory". In order to ensure survival, monarchs must constantly secure themselves, by expanding the number of social links they have. It this need of the monarchs that gives the next rank "citizens" some sort of power. Monarchs need support of the middling sort to keep themselves status safe. They usually take citizens under their wing and provide some sort of security or reward. This can lead to the building of factions. This technique keeps monarchs in power while limiting competition.

Citizens are high members of society. They are the higher middling sort, not preoccupied with power but still influential. Unlike the monarchs, citizens tend to interact with the peasants, and their position fluctuates the most out of all four social positions. Peasants are the lower orders, often striving for social progression or not interested at all. Both these social groups can fly up the ladder through paternalistic monarchs or through the "parasitical theory". The theory is that people can act as parasites to climb the ladder. People tend to use the influence of others to boost their own position and then jump to another person to boost their influence again and so forth. This theory is distinctly different to the paternal theory. The paternal theory is strictly action from the top-down whereas the parasitical theory is actions from the bottom-up.

The last social position are outcastes. This group usually contains people with foul personalities or people who are too radical that they endanger social stability. Outcastes usually claim not to be part of the social hierarchy, however, this is just a ploy to convince others or themselves that they don;t need social interaction. This reaction is an attempt to redefine themselves as independent and to boost themselves up the ladder once more. Social outcastes can usually reconcile themselves with the hierarchy through social evolution but scars are often made.

The main advantage of social substance is the bandwagon effect. If you are to say something, it will be more believable if others around you agree. This means people in the higher orders have opinions that are worth more, which is of course an incredibly powerful weapon. The next advantage is that of ego. Social standing can help to satisfy and often inflate many an ego. Outcastes and lower peasants usually have low self-esteem and this affects their social interactions, pushing their status even lower, as well as living rather sad lives.

The Future of Social Hierarchy

Society and social hierarchy will always exist as the power elite will always look for ways to perpetuate their power. Even if there was to be a revolution, power would simply change hands and the new power elite will look for ways to perpetuate power. Social distribution is possible but however unlikely. So until Neo-Marxist find a solution it looks like we're stuck with it.

japaneesee

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i ____.
s

nope its never gonna catch on, i reli dnt understand those stupid japs!

now i dont condone racism...but some times its funny.

or is it?

nah not reli if u think bout it

i mean how much offense do u actuli cause?

i make jews jokes all the time

but as soon as someone makes a stupid many arms hindu god joke i get all pissd off

maybe cos its so inaccurate

ignorance makes me so angry

but i love being igonrant, its bliss

does that make me a hypocrite?

how do u spell hypocrite?

hippo means horse

it latin

u now how u can tell latin is dead?

cos catholic priests dnt have babies....

cos theyre gay paedophiles...

now thats a huge generalisation!

and a lil racist aswell

but catholicism isnt a race now is it?

B ____ t
u ____o
t
____s
j ____o
e ____m
w ____e
i
s ____p
h ____p
____l
i ____!
s

i never got that

i never got a lot of things

like why does everything i talk about end up being about me?

am i that self obsessd?

why do i always end up analysing what i do?

like mussolini's economic policy

failure innit;)

so school starts soon

these exams have been well stressful

didnt even have time to write on my blog

but lukkily i dnt think ppl actuli red this wen they were revising

altho.....

im nt sure where i ws goin there

lol while im writin this im sorta half blankin george..

thats quite deep

lemme reply to what he sed hold up...

...

well i sed something stupid and he politely laughed..

they always do

theyre probly dying on the inside

i wouldnt know

theres alot i dont know

but who cares?

n
o

o
n
e
.
.
.
.

lol?

freshly squeezed blog juice

hey guys, heres me squeezing out a post in the middle of so far very unsucessful january exams. but we're not george so were not gnna talk about that ;) 2 all y'all that dont write on a blog on a regular basis u wouldnt understand how difficult it can be to simply churn one post out when u choose to do so, especially in the uninspiring january study leave. nothing has happened, i mean nothing! well apart from like israeli conflict n shiz but that doesnt really affect ME. so my c:/ gt corrupted a few days ago, and i sed goodbye to about 300gb of information while shedding a tear. its weird how personalized pc can get, like adjustin ur living room so its juuuuust right. well actuli i dnt do that my mum dus so visitors will be impressd. but we dnt get ne visitors nemor cos my house is crap. lol women.... its weird how u can get so emotionally attached to house hold objects aswell. i mean i ws sad cos i gt a new bed, all the memories that i had in that old one.. *thinks* good good but confused times. i havent had coffee in 72 hours and i slept like a baby last night, wel i woke up three times but u kno wen uve had a good sleep wen it feels like uve been asleep for ages. some people say they go to sleep and then they wake up not realising the time passing. i dnt think thats tru, well atleast not for me, i can sorta tell how long ive been asleep for most of the time. but last night i thought it ws like 7AMish but it ws only 3am, i ws pleasantly surprisd. u kno wt i ws sayin like at the start of this post, about it bein hard to write posts, well now ive sorta gt in the groove in this one ive changed my mind. its only hard if ur tryin too hard. like if ur tryin to sound cool or creative or funny or like wen i make a serious one. its ur mind set reli, u gtta just start day dreamin but then type wt ur thinkin even if its not interesting cos sometimes wt we think of as normal can seem weird to other people. lol y am i givin u tips on how to write a blog, like im an expert. but it is reli weird tho wen u write a post, now i kno how anne frank felt...sorta...it wud be unwise to make such a comparison. but i never RELI thought of it this way but writing is like the opposite of reading, i mean i did but i didnt REALLY. now i now people read differently aswell cos some ppl-like me-imagine a person reading out loud in their head or if its a novel the words eventually turn into pictures, but some ppl see the words and form images str8 away even if its like a biology or math txt book and thats kinda weird i thought. but neway reading sort of creates a stream of thought that ur sorta latching on to.... writin is like transmitting and then latching on to the stream ur on to keep u goin... lol that reli doesnt make sense.. ive always found it hard translate wt i think into words, my rents i talk way too fast but i think i speak just fine. u kno wt, i reli dnt trust recordings of my voice cos that reli isnt wt i sound like, i mean i WOULD know!! or wud i? wt do i know? actuli lets not get into epistemologics .. i tell wt i do know, man utd are like 2 points off the top of the table with a game in hand (15/1/09) lol it felt odd typin 09! its 2009 alredi man lifes just shooting past isnt it! it felt like only yday wen i ws revising C3.. oh yh 2 points of the top, but they lost rooney for 3 weeks. it wud take the piss if they win the league. arsenal were hypin up the 20th anniversary of when they won the league at anfield in like the 89 min or something wt a game! but in the advert the focus on fabregas and walcott.... how about we compare players that have their joints intact ay? man it feels following football is all i do anymore, apart from writin on a blog and revisin occasionally... and helpin my mum find fukkin gyms on the internet! that fukkin woman is so clueless! sigh *inhale..exhale..inhale..exhale*. well i lost that "stream" or wteva the fuk i ws ranting about, yh i can have sound like such a douche sometimes.. peace

Brainwashed Britain?

You know what guys? It’s time for another “serious” post... yay?! You know what else guys? The response to the freedom of speech post I wrote scared me. There seemed to be no opposition to the concept whatsoever, but is there any need to oppose it in any way? Of course there is! That’s why I’m going to give a more sustained version of my opinion and hopefully it’ll trigger some more encouraging feedback, not that I was unhappy with your comments before ;).

So why do we have freedom of speech in the first place? One argument is that it's one of our “natural rights”; anyone and everyone should be able to say whatever they want. This explanation doesn’t take into account laws on inciting racial hatred; it’s clearly not a natural right to convince people that coloured people are less than human. Well what other use could this freedom have? It allows different ideas to circulate as well as allowing people’s actions and ideas to be openly questioned and scrutinised. In other words it lays the foundations for political, ideological and social pluralism. It’s always a good idea to have different opinions, it’s what keeps scientists discovering and stops politicians turning into gods on earth. I suppose in turn this could lead to idea of toleration of different views and even a reduction of violence provoked by beliefs. On the other hand it could increase the amount of ideological clashes; too many cooks spoil the broth. This could lead to rather than reduce violence; looking at prime ministers questions, maybe different views doesn’t always produce a pleasant outcome.

I think the right of free speech was developed on the idea that people are rational thinkers. We are quite clearly not so rational, at least not all of us and certainly not all of the time. If we were, then we’d be in a war-free world. We’d be robots, probably communist robots :p. Not all people are educated and we're not all the brightest bulbs, people really are easily swayed. Set one Christian missionary in Nigeria and... whahey! You have a country of Christians, who think some kids are witches. Freedom of speech is potentially very dangerous. Hitler roused the masses through speech, but you’d defend his right to do so wouldn’t you Mr Voltaire?

Now I’m going to quote myself “freedom of speech allows... Ideas to be openly questioned and scrutinised” yet it seemed no one questioned the concept of free speech itself in my earlier post (does that make it useless?or is it ironic...whatever!). Does the idea of allowing others to express different views just mask the fact that there might well be an ideological monopoly already in place? Are we a nation of brain washed liberals? I mean if you met someone who was against the idea of universal suffrage you wouldn’t think twice about branding him as a radical, you’d “defend his right to say it” but his opinion would be worthless. If I were to openly oppose the idea of freedom of speech then my views would be seem as intolerant, I wouldn’t be taken seriously, and my opinion would not count as much as others’. I feel that this is precisely opposes what freedom of speech represents. We should be able to listen to different views (even if intolerant) and take them into consideration, not to unquestioningly obey liberal principles. There’s no point allowing other views to be expressed just to pay no attention to them.

I am well in favour of freedom of speech but I am aware of the many negatives it could produce. I feel the crucial notion cannot be truly understood or valued until its own existence is questioned. I hope you don't mind how I’ve patronized you, the majority of you probably feel that you’ve already thought of what I’ve said and i apologize. But I ask you now, are we a brainwashed nation just like any other fundamentalist country like Iran? Islamic theocracy and social democracy aren’t so different after all, are they :p?

end of 2008

word homepplz! i kno i sed i wudnt post until 2009 but i cudnt help myself, its 22:00 and i have nothing to do so wt the hell. so new years eve is comin, wt a bummer. yh soz im just makin small talk. the beginning of writing is always the hardest bit, just like in an exam innit? once u start u get stuk into it. malheuresment it doesnt get any easier some days:( i ws listenin to britney spears's new album and its wellll chuung, she gets a hard press these days...hmm wt an interesting thing to say. so new years is soon, im gnna go to joshs for it, but im nt lookin 4ward 2 it. bcos i hate everyone thats gnna be there, xcept for george matt merret and ofcors josh. but seriously wt a bunch of self obsessed incestual pricks. they look like a bunch of chavs frm hackney thrown thru topman/topshop. u kno who else i hate? non-conformists. not because they're weird, but because they don't want to be normal. for all those who think great artists and leaders are all slightly cooky and different to the rest of us, thats true, but they're always striving to be part of the rest of us, to make sense of the world they live and adapt. in effect great ppl are naturally queer. u kno wt else annoys me? ppl who have a go at non-conformists and then subtley try to indirectly persuade ppl that theyre great... any examples of that? god knows:p

hey wnna hear something funny? then listen to my podcast.

so this year hasnt been such a flop has it? lemme recap this year

jan 2008 - kavi sits his first A level module (critical thinking)
feb 2008 - kavi cries as arsenal start their decent down the table
mar 2008 - kavi steals £15 worth of condoms from his job in a pharmacy
apr 2008 - kavi cries again as arsenal are knocked out of the champions league
may 2008 - kavi sits some exams
jun 2008 - kavi quits job, successfully stealin over £120 in items
jul 2008 - kavi shaves head
aug 2008 - kavi gets surprisingly good a level results
sep 2008 - kavi's blog receives acclaim :p
oct 2008 - kavi starts writing for H.E.L.P magazine!:p wt an achievement#
nov 2008 - kavi turns 18
dec 2008 - kavi marks out what happened in his year but no1 reli cares

so that ws the year. actuli considering i had to reli think about wt happened ill say it ws a pretty crap year.

A conversation with the mirror 2

hey remember wen it ws easy being funny? wen u didnt even hav to try and ppl wud laugh? now its kinda sad wen u try to grab laughs by feigning ignorance. its even worse wen u deliberatley try to be un-funny because u kno u havent the wit to make an appropiate joke. u kno wts sad? the fact u masturbate twice a day!:P LOL dude get a gf! and not one of those asian ones... get one that;ll put out!

i love the fact im nt gnna be able to afford uni but yet ppl are all like "oh gosh kavi aren't devishly lucky considering you are most likely to get a government grant" yh cos im so desperatley poor that i shoppd at aldi b4 the credit crunch i workd 25 hours a week part time to save up enuf to pay for uni gosh im so lukky i dont have wealthy parents. and im gnna be 10 k in debt by the time i leave uni. oh how very proletariat of me to say so. but kavi ur not poor, ur on a fukkin computer, can poor people afford a PC? well i did get this pc from aldi. god those guys are life savers arent they?

isnt it sad once uve figured urself out? wen u can do something or say something and u kno the very angle ur workin at and it makes u sik. but kavi is there anything that doesnt make u sik? god u reli dont stop feeling sorry for urself do u?

weekend at moe's

so i spent the weekend at moe's, hes this guy ive known since like i ws 4 and man he is sooo chuung. i swer if i were gay i wud tap this guy so quiik. but im not and i think i wud be out of his league. hmm whos league am i in? i have no idea, have u ever tried to value how attractive u are? its reli hard cos everyone thinks theyr chuung in a certain way innnit. so any way i spent the weekend there. we played fifa. it was fun.

am i gonna be prime minister one day?

i told ppl that "one day im gnna be prime minister" and u kno wt they sed....they sed LOL kavi seriously ur an alright guy but ur a dum fuk... and then they suggested who they were backing to be the next prime minister ooo it made me so mad!! if john major cud be PM then why not me? if we can have a FEMALE prime minister then im feelin my odds are being good. id be a good pm right? actuli i think u'd have to be poltically correct:p tho bush wasnt. but he wsnt pm he ws president of the apparently the stupidest country in the world. i hate countries that adopt laissez faire economic policies, and to an extent i suppose i hate the UK. but things like the NHS do fill me the patriotism sometimes. so who would u vote for in the general election? ugh the tories are soo gay!! hug a hoody wt a fag! u shudnt be so harsh on the tories theyre nt soo bad. so wt if they fukkd up the economy in the early ninetees or snatched milk from small children. they won the war didnt they? they created the NHS, the stoppd there being a revolution against the monarchy. god bless disraeli. ugh wt am i sayin the tories are scum. i dnno where to support the libdems... they just seem sooo ummm amateurish..maybe wen im older. like wen im ded.

kavi's poem of fun

ip dip doo
im talkin to u
my blog is bre sik
like a aids infested brik ( which also has cancer. man thats such a sik sik brick:( sad story i wish i never get cancer its such a sad illness wrecks lives it does. u kno we shudnt even joke about it ever but ppl do and i just think its reli bad so if there anyone there that thinks its ok to joke about cancer i urge u not to)

well thats it for 2008 cya guys in 2009 peace out :)

The Dutch

schede schede schede! thats all we guys want right:D so this is gnna be my last post of 2008 so enjoy if u can, also i wud recommend not wastin ur time reading this if uve got january resits, go do some revision! so i sent my ucas off...and in one day i gt 3 offers:S also i gt an offer the day b4, so thats 4 offers in 2 days... nt bad ay? must be my dyanamic personality these unis love 8-) jokes. so im kinda in a rush to finish this post cos i wnna keep revisin the rump parliamnt. if u do too much histry u get kinda in a reading mode in which ur spoon fed information thru the books, it stops u makin ur own conclusions, which i have to say is probably the opposite of what an A in history should mean. a lvl histry dusnt involve analytical skills, u just remember other peoples analytical skills....hehe ANALytical:p i hope i spelt that right, it wud be awful embarassing to not have. i just looked outside thru the window and its alredi dark:S thats wt i hate about this year, the sun goes down earlier than its meant to. i know in winter the days get shorter but this is takin the piss. its dark at 15:30! well im gonna leave you with that to chew on for the holidays, hope u have a nice xmas, i kno i wont. hopefull knowing that itll make u feel that much better peace out! see ya in 2009! Lul Kut Stront Kontneuker Flikker( thats not an insult ) Neuk niet met me.Ik hoop dat je dood gaat!

Freedom of Speech/Expression

Hey guys, this is going to be a fairly short and sensible post but i would like some feedback via comments on the topic is that's alright:) So, freedom of expression. How far should this right be taken? I'm not actually sure if we have freedom of speech in this country, at least Mr Jenkins said something like that, but I'm pretty sure we have freedom of expression through human rights, and they're pretty much the same thing. Now...
1)Should a racist be able to express his views?
2)Should the BNP be banned?
3)Should Mr David Irving have been imprisoned for supposedly being a holocaust denier?
My Opinion:
Now I know those three all have links with racism, but that's probably why most people are afraid of freedom of expression in the west, since we're all allowed to criticise the government whenever we like. I would say YES a racist should be able to express his views; he would a flawed argument which would be incredibly hard to present, but they should nonetheless be able to express it. NO the BNP should not be banned. They MAY BE racist and hold other extremist views, but they should be able to criticise the government; this is a democracy after all. NO I don't think anyone should be imprisoned for denying the holocaust, even if it is illegal in Austria. I don't know whether to love or hate Mr Irving; he seems so rational at times. He has now come to accept the holocaust but still denies Hitler had any major part in the operation.
I'm sure lots of people would disagree with my views, or not even know who Mr Irving is, but please comment and let me know what you think.

The Renaissance

WOOO! guess whos back with a brand new rap pplz? and by rap i meant post! im totally hyped from all this caffeine in my blood stream, and its 2 good an oppurtunity to waste so blog blog blog time:D oo all this hyperness has made me hungry! ugh im gnna go make a sandwich! brb! kk back i cant believe i had to make it myself where my mum, my dad bought her for a reason, cost him a donky she did! mmmmm food...filling my stomach with goodness..argh theres so much runnin thru my hed i cant get it all down, i just gt an email from fiona mcfarlane from the culture show, u kno her right guys? she wnts me to go see a film of an asian film, racismm innit! i aint complainin, god this is a good sandwich. so wt makes a good post? where tanjil wen u need his opinion? probably at some amnesty international book sale, hes always there, well once in his life perhaps. i dnt get charities, i mean...UGH go away merret im tryin to write a post, brb..hah i showed him! i sed all his friends were losers! does that make me a loser? course not im not his friend, cos i dnt have ne friends, more on that later, wt ws i sayin?. i ws tinkin bout gettin a girl friend... cos ive been holdin bak from a realtionship...LOL yh right every1 knows im desperate for some loving...who am i tryna fool with that independent shit? i wanted a dutch gf like tanjizzle, that way ill get laid cos those dutch are soo modern like, and also she'd be my dealer, crazy dutch weed smokers. no wonder tajil looks 4ward to those letters! i wonder how mch stash comes erry fortnight ;) hehe speakin about fooling myself, perhaps i shud stop sayin im black, perhaps i shud stop sayin perhaps. just cos my rents were born in africa dont mean im black. also since my family west indian dont make me blak, just makes me from the west of india. but being just plain asian is sooo boring! half blak makes me cool! but african doesnt cos id have aids OH YH!!! charities! how long have charities been around? wts the point of giving to charity? theyr clearly doin a crap job and wastin ur money or all the problems wuda been solved ryt? i mean how long does it take 2 give african water? and theyve been gettin money for hoooow many years? giv ur money to kavi, he'll use it good, like on book for reading...knowledge has a price tag:D just look at bancrofts:p zach prince went bacnrofts innit, also raveethans dad sed he ws gnna send his other sons to bancroft cos the sixth form referees messd up and raveethan didnt get to apply to cambridge! raveethan has soo many brothers! like 5 or sumink like that! i wonder how much that must hurt his mum, physically and her wallet 2! 4 hungry tamils 2 raise. but theyre rich enuf, his dad runs tution innit, lol tooootion not tuition, tootion. why do tamils go tuition? tuition makes their hed hurt, and they come to skl and dnt pay attention and they learn even less than they wud normally and increases their need for tuition but noooo tamils dnt see the vicous circle? they only see civil war. i hate those idiots who supprt tamil tigers, y wud u support terrorists? or freedom fighters? tamils are clearly the minority, just piss off to some liberal country...oh whoops too late... now ur here stop complainin! lol ppl keep talkin to me on msn, and there ws me thinkin i didnt have friends:pkk im gnna say im busy, or maybe i shud just logg offf? nah im not cool enuf to not be on msn...god i wish i ws cool:( wt other ppl think is sooo important man, even wen ppl say they dnt care, they just ppl to think they dnt care, lol hypocrisy? or irony? lol maybe i shud read that post i wrote like ages ago? too long ago, hmmm i hate the past, it just maked me realise how stupid i was makin all those mistakes and in a couple of years ill think how stupid i am now makin the mistakes im currently making, like sleepin matts mother, god i almost gt arrestd with that kinky shit. also my fascism stuffs didnt help me at the black pride parade.. lol i at the parade i sed PRISON BREAK ! PRISON BREAK! lol geddit cos there ws a load of blakk pplz ? lol dw im not actuli racist, infact im half blakc? lol didd i explain that>? yh probz, u kno im nt gnna spell chek this so if things dnt make sense plz point them out yh. god i shud send off my ucas, everyones alredi gt offers n stuffs, and there i am waitin 4 my dad to "approve" my personal st8ment! i mean im 18 i dnt need ur fukin approval dad! 2 bad im too wimpish to say it 2 his face, or cos he wudnt understand since hes probbly wasted.. im probz 2 harsh on my dad, hes never actuli wasted at home except wen he comes home at like 2 am fromt he pub, but then im normally long asleep. ah man im hungry again! wheres that mother of mine? lol now ive talked about both my rentz.. u kno wt i think i shud end this post here, sorry if it ws a tad random, im finally sobering up from that coffee rush, ill make next post serious or atleast in good english kk? peace out homebwoiz bruup!

Reconception

Not quite the Renaissance of this blog, but we're getting there. I thought I should do some practice in blogging before I announce my full come-back. I believe I have succeeded in resetting my head but I feel I cannot quite yet start making sense of the world. I warn you that the word "I" -if it is a word rather than a letter - will be appearing quite a lot in this post, and I am not intending for this post to resemble anything close to interesting, so feel free to stop reading.


So if you've decided to tag along for the test-run, maintenance check or pre-season of this blogging revolution then you have only yourself to blame for any boredom related side effects you may encounter. I am now going to dive into my head and I shall record what I find when I re-surface. Here goes...

1) First attempt - failure to launch - I was unable to even flick the creative switch of my mind. There is probably a malfunction in the serotonin receptors. I shall re-boot and try again.

2) Second attempt - Semi-hallucinogenic state induced - success! I was able to enter the "happy" zone of my head but unable to translate any of the pure energy into comprehensible form.

3) Third attempt - Full train of thought created - well it seems I was actually able to create thought and opinion, but this is not a complete success, as it was mostly stimulated by outrage. I was able to codify some of the emotion,

"So variety night is finally over, now people can get back to the jobs they're getting paid to do, hint hint Mr Emdon, how bout u send of my ucas alredi? all these 6th formers have been wasting their skl time makin some crappy show, my rents dnt pay taxes just for paid skl time to be wasted! my rentz dont pay taxes full stop! jokes. and how comes they're chargin ppl to come? where does the profits go? i mean where does the revenue go, its not like the school pays for anythin like the hall or neting. i tink some of it shud go to the performers, but then again who chose the performers? the elite of the music department, the big headed, bourgoise who can afford instruments, who think theyre so much better than any of other part of the school because they think think "music talent" is a gift. its not. its just being able to practise. i can read, should i try to tell africans i am talented because of that? should i rub it in their noses? should i run crappy school run shows based on that fact, or a book club?"

Transmission was terminated through malfunction of the rationality matrix and perceived socialist tendencies. Overall I feel that can be seen as a satisfactory attempt at a post but modifications must and will continue be made to my head to ensure boundaries of thought are maintained.

a rotten apple core

f : x --> 3x-5
g : x --> e ^ -2x

state the range of g(x)....yh how bout u fuk off!?! ugh i hate maths, what the hell is that meant to mean anyway? how is it gnna help me in life? god i always start posts on a negative! lets start again..

i had a really great day today, arsenal lost and my mum died...kk im gnna start again one more time

well everything seems to be going against me recently but it doesnt seem matter, so that IS good:) i still have a histry essay 2 do for wednesday, ive had 3 weeks to do it so i think its meant to be good, but ho well. i found that i dont like histry nemore, italy is so boring. just thinkin about it is making me yawn. its also slightly depressing me, so moving on. i was think about vegetarians today. they say that killing animals is mean n cruel n stuff but thats such a bad argument.vegitarians are mean to people to eat mean all the time, why do animals deserve more respect? and you tryin to conserve life then why would you kill plants 2 eat? thats life too isnt it? apart from fruit i suppose, thats meant to be eaten if i remember biology:S u kno...im findin increasingly hard to think of things to write, im simply uninspired, plus im generally quite a boring guy, i can only talk about certain things for a certain amount of time. i was thinkin about takin a 2 week break from blogging. lol i almost thought people cared if i did. u kno i think ive developed a physical addiction to coffee. did i talk about that in my last post? well just incase i did i wont talk about it. hmmm kavi say something funny. u kno theres only two things i emotionally respond to these days, humour and depression. i'm tryin to find a bit in the middle. but its not working......... love is a disability, it stops you being able to see bad thing and thinkin evil thoughts... i dnno why i sed that but david bowie sed soemthing like that in one of his songs..wt a guy. u kno what..fin.

13/11/08

So what subjects do you take? Doesn't it make you cringe when a conversation can't start or is in serious danger of dying and this question pops up? Unfortunately for me this happens quite a lot.

Clichéd names

Kavi, a cosmic unicorn and a red wolf find themselves floating somewhere...

Kavi: .......so.... this is a litte awkward...
Red wolf: SILENCE!
Cosmic unicorn: hey hey! dont be rude! why are you here little boy?
Kavi: i dnno! one minute im writing on my blog and the next..whoosh! floating in space!
Cosmic unicorn: what makes u sure so sure u r floating in space?
Kavi:well because its dark n stuff...im pretty sure this is what space is.
Red wolf: well then you'll be surprised to find out we not in space, we are in a vacuum of reality, in a place incomprehensible
Kavi: no were in space! isnt space just one big vacuum? i mean theres nothing in it, what difference does putting "of reality" at the end make?
Cosmic unicorn: lol he got u there
Red wolf: the very fact that you have defined space as what is inside of the vacuum you mentioned allows there to be a definition of the void and therefore is no longer a vacuum.
Kavi:.....
Cosmic unicorn:......
Red wolf: what i mean to say is that were are in neither in nothing nor something, what we are in cannot be defined.
Cosmic unicorn: ok? but who cares? dude why did you even ask that question?
Kavi: i dnno! i thought i could sound smart
Cosmic unicorn: well u sure made the 2 of us look reeal dum dint u!?! so nehoo u dont actuli know why you're here?
Kavi: nope!
Red wolf: why he is here is irrelevant!
Kavi: hey! wocha tryna say?!
Red wolf: SILENCE!
Cosmic unicorn: jeez! enough with the SILENCING! who dya think you are?
Kavi: nah its cool dude! i dnt mind being quiet for a while
Red wolf: good.
Cosmic Unicorn: dude ur here cos me n SILENCE mccgee here decided to spread our message
Red wolf: you brought him here?
Cosmic Unicorn: yh why not?
Red wolf: i say that we shouldn't tell anyone of our ways and you decide to bring someone?
Cosmic Unicorn: mmhmm thats my job remember!
Kavi: so in the void of reality you are employed? that seems kinda dum to me guys
Red wolf: do not question me boy!
Cosmic Unicorn: what he means to say is that "employed" is not the correct word. our arrangement of existence is mutually beneficial
Kavi: what exactly do you guys do?
Red wolf: we hold ultimate power
Kavi: over what?
Cosmic Unicorn: over all that exists
Kavi: then how comes you didn't know i was going to come then wolfy?
Red wolf:...
Cosmic Unicorn: because you do not exist you are not in the a dimension of existence.
Kavi: u say that, but im quite clearly existing, i mean im talkin to you guys aren't i?
Red wolf: you perceive you are talking, you hear yourself, feel you lips moving. because you can sense physical properties associated with speech, it does not mean that your speech exists.
Kavi: so the fact that i can hear and see you doesnt necessarily mean you exist?
Red wolf: it is a possibility
Cosmic Unicorn: and the fact that he said were not in a dimension of existence, im pretty sure we dont
Kavi: then what makes you ultimately powerful?
Red Wolf: by existing we ensure that doubt and confusion ensues
Cosmic Unicorn: we do the things that people can't explain by simply being there
Kavi: but i thought you said you aren't there! you said you don't exist
Red wolf: we don't need to be sensed in a physical form to exist
Cosmic unicorn: nor do we have to exist to be perceived to exist
Kavi: my head hurts:(
Cosmic unicorn: yh it usually does when people think about it
Kavi: hey can i ask you something?
Red wolf: sure!
Kavi: how comes you got all explainy and less snobbish suddenly wolfy and you stopped being all nice and hip unicorn?
Cosmic unicorn: because you wanted it that way
Red wolf: we often apprehend what we choose to apprehend
Kavi: i dont understand. you guys changed because i wanted you to change?
Comsic Unicorn: precisely
Kavi: so i can make you what i want to make you? i can destroy you or create you? are you guys even there? are you just a figment of my imagination?....guys?